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Sexy Secrets

(Me at 18, as a model)

Girls – let’s be Sexy!
Ok Girls. Here’s the scoop. You want to read sexy books, you know where to go - (totally, you know…) and you want to write sexy books, well, there are lots of good places for advice. But if you want to be sexy, and look sexy, and make your husband (lover) go WOW, well, you’ve come to the right place. Not only will I give up my trade secrets (I was a model with Elite!) but I’ll tell you the things I’ve learned over the years to keep those flames sizzling.

You know – it’s easy to write a love scene when you have two young characters who are newly in love, discovering each other, and desperately hot for each other. It’s not as easy to write a love scene between a couple who have been married for twenty five years, who have an ordinary life with your ordinary ups and downs. Maybe it’s because I’m a Leo. We Leos love a

challenge. My husband is your typical tall, strong, silent type. He’s not into communication. Like most men, he’s happy with the status quo. And that’s exactly why you have to shake things up a bit now and then.

Every few months, you should try to rekindle the romance and sexiness in your love life. Even if it only ends in a massage and a cuddle – there is something essential about sexiness. Sexiness doesn’t have to mean fireworks, and it certainly doesn’t mean tacky. Sexy is clean. It’s clean hair, clean nails, and clean bodies. And girls – you’d be surprised at how many women forget this! Sexy is wearing something else beside sloppy ‘around the house’ clothes when you’re trying for sizzle.
Ashley Ladd made an excellent point when she blogged about sexy lingerie. Wearing just one item of super-sexy clothing can make a big difference—even if it’s just a scrap of silk and lace.

Here are some of my trade secrets, learned while I was a model in Paris:

Trade secret number 1) High priced cosmetics and low priced cosmetics are made by the same manufacturer. Cosmetic companies all use more or less the same products – you are paying for the brand name and packaging. Never pay more than 30$ for a face or body lotion. The same goes for make-up.

Trade Secret number 2) With make-up, less is more. I have a gray eye-liner, my eye-shadow is dark gray and peach (two colors in the case) I use the narrow end of the applicator to draw the powder on like an eye-liner on my lower lid, the pale color goes on top. Use mascara if your lashes are pale. Models with great complexions usually just put on face cream and a dash of powder. If you have a spotty complexion, then try a little foundation mixed with your face cream. It will make it lighter and easier to apply. Use a little powder, and a little blush. Blush makes your face glow. Too much blush makes your face look like a tomato.

Trade Secret number 3)
Get enough exercise. My grandfather was a gym teacher and athletic counsellor, so all my life I’ve had exercise drummed into my brain as being the best thing for your health. So do at least one half hour a day of exercise. Come on, it isn’t that hard! A half an hour walk with your dog – kids – friend! A half an hour brisk walk. That is a minimum requirement. If you can, join a gym or go to the public pool, or just take a walk through your local park. When I was a model, I didn’t have much free time. You wake up at 5 a.m. for make-up and hair styling, and you finish work late, late at night. It was hard to grab a half hour to exercise, and a lot of times I was too tired to even think about it. I was skinny – but flabby! I didn’t start to get back in shape until after my kids were born. But I’m happy to report that half an hour a day of exercise can make a difference!

Trade Secret number 4) Eat right. Sexy is having good eating habits. Chips, cookies, and processed foods are out, carrot sticks dipped in lemon juice are sexy. Buy apples and bananas for snacking and drink water! Forget diet sodas, sodas, or alcohol. Your body AND your budget will thank you. When I was a model, I used to eat on the fly, and meals were never very balanced. But I always had an apple or an orange tucked away in my bag, and I always had a big bottle of mineral water. I called that my beauty secret.

Trade secret number 5) Get lots of rest. This might sound like a no-brainer, but I’ve had three kids, and jobs that stress me, and everyone has problems that drive them to distraction. But getting enough rest is essential. Try yoga or meditation before sleeping. Drink an herbal tea like chamomile before going to bed. I can’t count the number of times the photographer yelled at me because of circles around my eyes. Make-up artists are always trying to cover up signs of fatigue—thank goodness for models that now there are computer programs that erase dark circles and fatigue lines! Getting lots of rest is essential to having glowing skin and feeling good. It took me years to learn this lesson though.

My little secret) Now I know that day-to-day sizzle and sexy is impossible. You work, he works, the kids need your attention…But if you can set aside a few hours a month JUST FOR YOU TWO, it will make a big difference. Coordinate a day, an afternoon, or an evening. Plan ahead, or make it a surprise. Be inventive! Try wearing a short skirt with no underwear if you know you’ll be alone with your hubby in a secluded spot. Light candles in the bedroom and turn off the lights. Do a strip tease. Give each other massages with some light lotion, or even use a silk scarf. Just little things can make a big difference. Start by turning off the television and getting out the cards or scrabble. Play a game of strip poker or ‘dirty words’ scrabble. Eat a sexy fruit together. Read a couple steamy paragraphs from your favourite Total-e-Bound book. Or just take a walk, just the two of you, and hold hands like when you were first dating.
If you find your love-life sliding into the same old, same old…then do something quick! It’s up to you, girls!

It’s easy and it works. It takes a little time and a little imagination, but if you love your partner, you’ll try to keep the sizzle and sexiness alive in your love life. Romance should never be allowed to die!

(me at 47 as a mom)

Samantha Winston
author of
'Ranger's Woman'
at Total-e-Bound


Jamie Hill said...

What a cutie, Samantha! The model pics are amazing, but then so are you today!

Thanks for the great post.


Sam said...

Thank you Jamie!
I'm a Leo, so compliments will get you everywhere, lol.

Jennah said...

That must have been an amazing career. I completely agree with all the secrets even though I don't follow all of them as I should (particularly the walking).

Ashley Ladd said...

I concur. Fantastic pics (now, too) and great advice. I never thought to blend my foundation with my moisturizer.

I'll have to see if the hubby will play dirty word Scrabble. We definitely need to rekindle the romance. We've been married 28 years and we're just 1 year older than you, if even that.

Sam said...

Hi Jennah - it was kind of a fun career (five years) but it was also a lot of work and travel, and in my day, the pay wasn't all that great! LOL

Ashley - Happy 28th anniversary! That is terrific!! We've been married for 24 years - so I know it's hard to rekindle that spark of romance. I'm a big believer that it has to be kept burning though!

littlelamblst said...

I enjoyed your post. Great photos! A lot of what you said were the common sense reminders that we occasionally need. Thanks!

Sam said...

you're welcome littlelamblst!
It is common sense, isn't it? Amazing how easy it is, lol!

Lyn Cash said...

Sam, you heifer - I WOULD have to follow you. *grin* Well. *sniff, sniff* Don't expect cute photos of this old bag tomorrow. I'll be lucky if I can haul my arse out of bed.

My own fault. Went to bed at 6 this morning and was up at 8:30 - lol. Just one of those days, too much to do and not enough sense to get the beauty rest.

Have a great night. Major hugs from a fan.

Sam said...

Haha! That's what I was thinking yesterday, looking at Ashley's post! LOL!

Ashley Ladd said...

Looking at my post? You did great Sam and how pretty you are - you don't look a day over 27 - I can't believe 47.