It's almost Halloween and I couldn't resist one more top ten list. Of course, I can't forget that I have a fantastic new release this month with co-author Jude Mason called Feral Heat, a paranormal, changeling, m/m/f extravaganza, so be sure and check it out here!
Business out of the way, on to this lists!
10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go at it again.
8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
7) You don't have to compliment the person who gives you some.
6) It's O.K. when the person you're with fantasizes you're someone else, because you are.
5) Forty years from now you'll still enjoy candy.
4) If you don't like what you get, you can always go next door.
3) It doesn't matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning.
2) Less guilt the morning after.
1) YOU CAN DO THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD.
I found this yesterday on a Yahoo blog and it was so funny I had to share it. Erin Zimmer put together this list of our top 10 Halloween treats that nobody wants... (She wrote the commentary,I just laughed!)
Dentists and orthodontists should not be allowed to celebrate Halloween if they're going to get all tooth doctory on us.
Little boxes of stuck-together shriveled globs are not what little kids schlep around the neighborhood for all night.
The most polarizing candy of all. The fruitcake of Halloween; it just never goes away. If you love them, fine. But don't subject the rest of us haters to the sickeningly sweet triangle that tastes like neither candy nor corn.
Smarties and Necco Wafers
These chalky candies are supposedly "fruit-flavored," but no fruit I know tastes like dust -- and makes everything eaten after taste like dust, too.
Usually, foods on a stick are yummy (corn dogs, ice pops), but Dum Dums just can't be included on that list. Not even if they were breaded and deep-fried and served at a fair.
Long before "poisoned candy" scares, evil people were handing out apples instead of candy on Halloween. This disappointing "treat" is the main reason to avoid unwrapped food while trick-or-treating.
It looks like chocolate and sort of smells like chocolate, but the mini brown tubes are not real chocolate. They taste like watered-down chocolate, and have a chewy texture that will strip the fillings right off your molars.
Halloween is supposed to be a holiday for young people, not senior citizens who suck on hard candies all day.
I do not laffy when I get these. I sobby. I get depressedy. Because it gets all stucky to my teethy and doesn't even taste that goody.
Who started calling it this? Since when is one bite fun?! Give us the rich houses with the sprawling driveways and full-sized candy bars any day. Portion control doesn't need to start this young.