I know this blog is read world-wide but with a ‘hi there’ to my Australian sisters sitting around in their summer clothes, for us in the northern hemisphere this time of year means only two things, cold and frantic. So I thought I would just urge you to take a few moments out of your shopping and cooking schedule to contemplate how erotic fiction makes a positive contribution to this time of year.
Firstly, there are studies that show that women who read erotic fiction of all types have much more active and satisfying sex life. This requires that they jump about and expend energy, lots of energy. As we are all concerned with global warming, what better way to conserve fossil fuel than to generate your own heat under the sheets or in shackles, as is your preference, in the comfort of your own home.
Secondly, not only does erotic fiction reduce the amount of green house gases but you are giving yourself a little free gift of a rip roaring orgasm without putting it on the plastic. Again, so important with all the expenditure demanded to make the season ‘special’ and with a credit crunch threatening to send civilisation as we know it back to the dark ages, much more sensible, don’t you agree?
Thirdly, presents! Why on earth are you trudging around the shop looking for that special gift for you best girlfriend? Get wise! Do you really think she needs another collection of smellies or a box of chocolate? No, she needs a strong, bare-chested man to whisk her into the Scottish mist and make love to her all night. Unfortunately, you don’t find many of them on the selves in big department stores, more the pity, so you’ll have purchase one from Total-e-Bound. There is an added bonus to dispensing with the usual gifts and going for something she really wants. In the TEB store you’re not limited to the store buyer choice as TEB has countless number, colours and varieties and even species of man for you to choose from.
Lastly, ‘Men are so difficult to buy for’. No they are not. Buy them something to wear. Well, not to wear themselves, that is bloody difficult ( my hero asked for a Nike sweat shirt one year then didn’t like it because the tick was too large????) But I can’t imagine any full-blooded man complain about what’s Santa left him under the tree if you are wearing it. Buy him a pair of suspender with crotchless panties and peek-a-boo bra to match and he’ll be tearing the bows off before you’ve said Happy Christmas. Or, if you were a smart girl and bought him that for his birthday, wrap him up a riding crop or some nipple clamps and see if he doesn’t yo-ho-ho. You’ll get endless ideas for such items within the pages of all of TEB books.
So as you can see Erotic Fiction is not only good for the environment, our pockets and our men but it can go right through the chilly weather and keep us smiling until Easter when you can apply the same principles and give him a jar of spreadable chocolate and a brush instead of an Easter egg.
Happy Holidays ~ Ellie Tremayne.