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The four hour erection, or the effects of chemical stimulation

I don't usually watch television, commerc ials. I have to admit it. I'm real;ly sorry for all the advertisers who think they're going to capture my attention with their promos that run the gamut from cutesy to bizarre, but I just find most of them stupid and distasteful. However, my brain pops to alert when the ads for Cialis and Viagra coem on the air.

First of all, I've discovered to my shock and amazement, that the majority of the male population, at least in the United States, must suffer from a raging case of erectile dysfunction. Otherwise, why run so many commercials that you can't seem to get away from them? And the percentages of men dealing with this turn out to be quite amazing, according to what the ads say. What's with all these men, anyway? I remember when you couldn't get a man to keep it in his pants. Now it seems he can't take it out without chemical assistance.

And then there are the warnings - beware of side effects: back pain, drop in blood pressure, muscles aches. Men used to get these after sex, not before. But the warning that really gets me is: Be sure to see your doctor if you have an erection lasting more than four hours. Four hours? Where is this man? I want to find him right away.

Now, I have to tell you, I am no spring chicken and I have seen a lot of life. B ut I can honestly say that I've never met a man who had an erection lasting four hours. Good lord! I shoujld think the women would be lined up at his door, taking a number. Think of the money he could make, even if he only performed one night a week. And then of course there are the book rights and the movie rights, and... Well, I guess it shows what a difference chemicals can make - from nothing to everything.

What I want to know is what's happened to the male population that at thirty they need chemical help getting an erection? Did they wear it out at an early age? Did they not know how to use it? Did they forget to take good care of it?

I've decided that this would make a great sotry - a man experimenting with drugs for erectile dysfunction comes up (you shoujld excuse the expression) with an erection that won't go away and decides to see how long he can perform before it does. Hmm. A new project for Desiree Holt.

And watch for me next month at Hitting the Hot Spot when I tell you about the article I read that says the reason women are susceptible to multiple partners is because men are born with a selfish gene.

Until then, when you're out shopping and walking around in the stores, or in a restaurant or bar, keep your eyes out for that guy who has a permanent tent in his pants.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

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