So, we’re camping this weekend, my husband and me. Should have known better since camping rarely works out well for me. The troubles began before we ever left the house – hubby “tagged” someone on his way home. Yep. Hit the brakes and slid right into someone’s rear end. Luckily, the guy he hit was understanding, so they simply exchanged information and each went his own way. Did I mention it was raining? And had been ALL DAY? And that it was cold. Cold for me anyway. So, an hour and a half after we had planned to leave, we’re off. We drive the 2 hours to the campsite and it’s packed. Finally, we locate an empty campsite and back the trailer into the spot. In the rain. Did I mention it was raining? And dark now. And raining? And cold??? Anyway, we get the camper set up. In the rain. Then head out to a winery. We always camp near wineries.
Now here’s the best part. We’re inside the winery – since it was still raining – and sharing a lovely bottle of wine and a chicken alfredo pizza when I overhear an interesting phrase from the couple across the loft from us. “Manscaping.” I giggle – naturally – and this catches their attention. It turns out that Jeff, a handsome, tall guy with brown curly hair had never heard of manscaping. His wife, a drop-dead, gorgeous blonde, is close to tears from laughing at him (okay, not really HIM, but rather his reaction to the term and my giggling.). We explain the term to him. He has a few questions – wouldn’t the jewels get in the way of an artful design? What type of guy would want a heart “scaped” into his fuzzy hairs? What happens if the razor slips? He’s truly intrigued by this whole concept and simply wants more information.
We eventually finished up our bottle and headed back to the camper. In the rain. Did I mention it was raining? And dark? And cold? And there were – oh, I don’t know – somewhere in the neighborhood of a million deer on the road???? Despite the odds, we made it back safely (despite having to stop to add a few quarts of transmission fluid to the really old and really unreliable Jeep) and had a lovely night’s sleep.
The next day we hit a few more wineries – oh, it had stopped raining finally! – and lo and behold – we run into Jeff and Jenny again. Turns out, they are celebrating their 19th anniversary – so, a big shout out to them!!!! Jeff now understands all about manscaping and completely understands how keeping the twig and berries free of “debris” can enhance a woman’s pleasure (NO ONE likes picking hair out teeth!) and, therefore, enhances the man’s pleasure! I’ve promised to mention them in a blog, and so I have. I promise, I’ll write a much hotter one later this week. When I finally get home. But that could take a while.
Why you ask? Well, today as we were on our way up to the lodge to enjoy a delightful Sunday brunch, the Jeep sputtered and spurted again. Then died. As in dead. As in died. Now hubby is a fairly gifted backyard mechanic, but he was stumped. So now, we’re stranded in a camper. Luckily, the kindness of strangers is not something available only to psychopathic women named Blanche. After walking over a mile in inappropriate shoes to the lodge, the manager allowed us to eat breakfast after they would normally have closed the breakfast buffet. He gave us a ride back to the dead Jeep, and then back to the campsite and gave us the name and number of a local mechanic. Local mechanic took time out of his Sunday to tow the dead Jeep into town and will look at it tomorrow morning. Our son brought us a vehicle (being able to laugh at his father seemed a fair trade for the long drive down) and then promptly left again, cackling all the way.
So what did you all do this weekend?