Over the next few months, my husband and I will pack up all our things and move into the home of our dreams. We have waited for this for a very long time, and it's hard to believe that the big moving day is almost here. We've already started talking about the things we will do with the big deck, the long nights in front of the fireplace and how nice it will be to live in our little haven in the woods.
And of course, we've been planning out the christening.
What's the christening, you ask? Well, let me tell you!
The christening is the act of having some sexual fun in every room of the house, including the closets. It's the act of walking through the house when it is empty, before the movers show up, and having sex in the places that you won't be able to manage very easily once the furniture is in place. Like the aforementioned closets. Or the middle of the living room floor, right where the couch will be. Or on the dining room floor, or the laundry room -- right where the washer and dryer will go when they finally get there.
The idea is to create the earliest memories in the home, all relating to sex. That means that when you look at each other over that dining room table while you're having that dinner party, you can wink at each other with the knowledge that you were doing the nasty right where that fine table now sits. Or when you do the laundry, you can pull out the towels and grin about the fact that this little space has seen more heat than just some steam from the dryer!
But it also leaves the "goodbye" sex for our old place, which means that after the movers get the things out of there, we can do a reverse christening of sorts -- saying goodbye to the old place by having sex in all those places you haven't touched in years. We'll probably start right on the carpet, between the little indentations that show where the couch once sat...
We're going to be quite happy in our new house. And we're going to be so damn tired and sore by the time we actually move in!
How do you celebrate a new abode? If you haven't engaged in a sexual christening yet, there's still time -- just push that couch out of the way and get it on in the middle of the living room to get started!